Clawing out of Depression's Grip

Not long ago, depression had me in its insidious grip, squeezing every shred of self confidence with which I manage to shroud myself. Clawing and writhing my way out of its clutches leaves me first pondering how I found myself there in the first place, and then tending to the wounds it inflicted. These wounds, some of them merely scratches that will heal quickly; others deeper with darkening bruises, which will turn to sickening green (how I feel about them, and sometimes me), and then fade completely.

With the significant changes I've made in my diet and the increase in exercise, I definitely experience fewer depressive states. When I do have them, it seems that they are still intense and I still feel anxious, but I think that the anxiety is a result of the tachycardia I experience during the luteal phase of my cycle, which is also when I tend to succumb to depression.

After my hysterectomy in another couple of weeks, I won't have ovaries, ergo, no luteal phase. So, might it be possible that without the surge of progesterone and testosterone, I will no longer experience tachycardia? Without the tachycardia, will I no longer have that feeling of anxiety? I don't think that my depression will be eliminated completely, but wouldn't it be lovely if it were simply a shadow skittering across my mental landscape rather than the monster I described above?

Symptomology 101

Throughout these posts, I have mentioned symptoms and associated many of those symptoms with possible root causes. I've made dramatic lifestyle changes and I'm experiencing either a resolution of or a decrease in the intensity of my symptoms.

I call that success!

I decided to take a moment to celebrate my successes and speculate on which life change may have contributed to the improvement of symptoms.

Acne
Significant changes in not only what I eat, but when and how much I eat have contributed to completely clearing up acne breakouts. I'm positive that going dairy free, and eliminating potatoes, rice, and white flour, have contributed to eliminating this particular malady.

Excessive Sweating
While I haven't found the off switch for this lovely symptom, it is greatly reduced. I've noticed that the onset is usually when my blood sugar levels are high that I'm particularly susceptible to sweating. Further, when I'm exercising my sweating is within acceptable limits, so long as I drink plenty of water before, during, and after an activity. I'm fairly sure that eliminating caffeine and drinking buckets of water have been key to alleviating this fun symptom.

Assorted
Some of the following symptoms I know are addressed by using a CPAP. Others depend on my blood sugar levels, amount of daily excercise, and my stress levels. Still, significant improvements overall.

• Anxiety reduced
• Depression reduced
• Daytime fatigue reduced
• Forgetfulness reduced
• Lack of energy during the day reduced
• Loud snoring gone!
• Mood changes reduced
• Morning headaches reduced
• Sleepiness reduced
• Slower reaction time reduced
• Restless sleep reduced
• Recurrent awakenings reduced
• Insomnia reduced
• Vision problems reduced
• Waking up with a very sore or dry throat gone!
• Waking up with a choking or gasping sensation gone!

Related Links

• How lifestyle, daily routine affect blood sugar
• Patient information: Diabetes mellitus type 2: Alcohol, exercise, and medical care (Beyond the Basics)
• Pre-Diabetes&Lifestyle Changes to Prevent Type 2 Diabetes

Agnsty, Not Only for Poets and Teens

I love that word. When I looked it up, I found this definition in the Urban dictionary:

Generally it involves the feeling of not being understood by anyone and that the person is alone in the world.

The Merriam-Webster free online dictionary has this nugget:

feeling, showing, or expressing anxiety, apprehension, or insecurity

My teens are in the former group, which makes total sense, because, well, they're teens. I'm in the latter group, my guess is because I'm neither a poet nor a teen (although there are times when I act like one). Anxiety and its cohort, depression, have been my companions for quite some time. Probably about the time I started infertility treatments. (I am blessed with three amazing kids. More on that story, later.) However, anxiety and depression have been particularly present in the last few years. Probably about the time insulin resistance reared its ugly head, unbeknownst to me. The good news is, now things make sense in ways that baffled me before. The bad news is, I must take better care of myself. I mean, you know, like put myself first sometimes. How bad can that be?

I'm curious, though. How much of my anxiety and depression are health related? As I ease into a healthier lifestyle and continue to put myself first in positive ways, will my depression and anxiety lessen? Will I be in a position where I can cut back on my "happy pills?" These are questions I hope I'll have answers (in the affirmative) to in the near future. It looks like, by continuing down the path of eating healthy and exercising, I could very well reverse insulin resistance and its unsavory symptoms in about a years time. I tend to be a rather goal-oriented individual, so of course I'm writing the goal of eliminating the whole prediabetes thing in gold letters on my bucket list.

I have found that sleeping better, thanks to the CPAP machine, has improved my over-all state of being. I'm positive that exercise is also responsible for helping smooth out my rough edges. Therefore, it must be possible that eating well, and managing or eliminating the massive levels of insulin wrecking havoc on my body, may very well contribute to reducing my angsty depression, as well.

That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it.

Related Links

• Serum androgens and depression in women with facial hirsutism.
• Severity of depression and anxiety in obstructive sleep apnea syndrome
• What's the connection between diabetes and depression?

Teal Ribbon Cysterhood

Yesterday I became an official, card-carrying member of the PCOS community. On the one hand, I feel pretty smart for figuring it out for myself. On the other hand, it's sucks and I'm mad-as-hell that I have a syndrome, which is essentially a catch-all phrase that experts use when they don't have a clue what to do with you. Great, just lump a bunch of us who share similar symptoms together, scratch your collectives heads, and label us with "syndrome." Yeah, that's me throwing a cyber tantrum. Fat lot of good it does, aside from letting off a bit of steam, huh?

Speaking of fat, the experts say that loosing just 10% of your weight can reduce the severity of PCOS symptoms. That sounds easy, yes? Well, as easy as it is for anyone to eat healthy and exercise. Only, with the added challenge that the PCOS syndrome can include that lovely increase in weight. What the heck, what's life without a few challenges, right? So, what exactly can one with PCOS eat, and what are the things that one should avoid?

I explored a cross section of PCOS diets out there, and most all of them agree that becoming the next non-Dairy Queen is the next best thing to sliced bread. This was a bit disconcerting, as I grew up believing that milk has something for every body. Is it possible that the dairy industry lied to me? To us? Shocking! Well, not really, they are in the business of selling milk, cheese, and ice cream. When it comes to cheese and ice cream - oh, and hot chocolate! - avoiding dairy hits me the hardest. I mean, try and order a bean and cheese burrito without the cheese, or a quesadilla, for that matter! I can do pizza sans cheese, but then there's the white flour used in the crust, and white flour is another no-no.

That does make things like eating out a problem. Heck, that makes eating in a bit of a challenge, too.

For me, losing weight and eating healthy means limiting my personal choices, thereby making it easier to shop, prepare, and stay on track. I've taken to wearing a pedometer again, and that helps me increase my daily activity, as I challenge myself to reach 10,000 steps every day. I've hit it a couple of times so far, yay me!

Related Links

• PCOS Diet Support
• PCOS Nutrition – PCOS Diet
• PCOS Support Groups